[ She doesn't share that she doesn't think he would've gotten hurt if she didn't try to get around taking them out in the first place. She should've just shot them the second they walked in that room. ]
Thanks to the doctors. All I did was lug you around like a tall potato sack.
[ She says it as she sits down with the tea, watching Akashi as he finishes setting out the snacks. Once they're plated she'll take one off and hold it in front of her, looking pretty excited about it. They were pretty good, and it's probably too casually that she says this: ]
If anyone threatens you, just call me and I'll take care of it.
[ She lets it end at that. She'll try not to kill anyone in front of him, but she's not going to promise no one will get hurt. She tried to make sure no one got hurt, but Akashi was too arrogant to cooperate. Trying anything as benevolent as a peaceful solution despite that she's capable of it is too much of a risk with someone who won't listen to her. She won't risk their lives to try to prevent bloodshed. But since he's so sensitive about it, because it's so fresh to him, she adds as if it should be a comfort to know: ]
[ The usual cordial smile he has plastered on his face disappears, replaced by something more serious. He doesn’t want to think about what happened, but he can’t exactly stop thinking about it. Emerald is right in thinking that it’s a fresh memory. It’s only been recently he’s gotten over being bit by a vampire (though he’s still angry about the situation), and then getting poisoned happened... ]
I’ll just be staying in the city from now on. At least here, I’ll be safe.
[ And if anybody threatens him here, it will be a lot more manageable. ]
[ There's a distinctive tone to her voice, and though it's not quite snide, it's clear that she doesn't buy what he's saying one bit. Not the part that he'll be staying in the city- she's already forming her own opinions on how Akashi's a lot of bark and very little bite. But her own experiences, knowing Mercury's experiences, very much colors her view of what he thinks is safe. Rather than overcome his weakness, he's choosing to hide and hope that his survival isn't threatened again. He's not safe, he's just decided to lie to himself and bank on everyone around him being strong enough to handle what he can't. ]
So did you bring these because you liked them or I liked them?
[ She's certainly not going to be the one to rain down on his parade unless he pushes it. She pops the mochi into her mouth, instead focusing on her question. She's definitely not complaining about the mochi. ]
[ Give her a moment. She may be a street rat, but she's got manners. At least enough not to talk with her mouth full. And mochi is chewy and she popped the whole thing in instead of just taking a bite.
.......
Ok! Swallowed! ]
I like them, I was just wondering. I was just telling Tetsuya the other day that you let me try these, don't blame me that it's suspicious timing.
Oh, he hadn’t mentioned anything about your conversation. [ Akashi relaxes at Emerald’s response. Good to know she has nothing against what he brought. ] It’s all just a coincidence.
[ Finally, he takes a piece of mochi for himself to eat. This is all the sweets he’ll be eating for the month. :)
There’s something else he wants to say, though. Something about what happened, but he figures to just bring it up later on. Maybe once they’re done eating. ]
It would be wrong to pretend what happened in Shaarnath didn’t... well, happen. [ He looks at his tea. The usual arrogance he has in each stare replaced by a pensive look. ] I wanted to thank you, but I also want to ask some questions.
[ That wasn't why he brought food, Emerald. But anyway, Akashi will get straight to business. He had wanted to wait until they had finished eating, but... it seems like the time is right, now. ]
I'd been wondering. . . did you really intend to kill that man?
[ Emerald watches him for a moment. He's trying to understand. She doesn't know that that's a good thing or not. It makes that pit in her stomach act up again, that anxiety she feels that he's going to realize she's not worth sticking around. She's a bad person, but he's never actually seen it until then. He still hadn't really seen it, and by the way he says "that man" he probably didn't realize that Emerald was the reason the other one had been shot by his ally. She doesn't correct it, because there's a good chance that he's dead. She'd thought he'd be fine from a slow bleed if the medics got there in time, but if the arrows were poisoned, there's a good chance that was a kill, and a slow, agonizing one. She reaches out for another mochi, but this one she's more or less just knocking around the plate with the fork.
She doesn't have to lie about this, at least. Her intent wasn't to kill them. ]
If you'd cooperated, I was going to make them mis-see binding our wrists, then mis-see us walking ahead of them. We would get them out into the hallway and secured an exit, then just fell back while they kept walking. They wouldn't have realized we were gone until we had plenty of time to get out of sight. No one would've gotten hurt but me, and only a headache. Those two were just desperate to survive without being imprisoned for the rest of their lives, I would've let them get away if they hadn't hurt you. Intent doesn't always matter.
[ And the second they had, it was a matter of survival. She wouldn't have hesitated if Akashi hadn't stopped her, she was eliminating a threat. ]
[ It just feels like the blame is being passed onto him. His eyes narrow and his lips form a frown, and he decides to stay quiet and just let his thoughts flow freely.
He decides to just let it pass. He’s not going to apologise for not wanting to kneel for anybody. The power he holds in Japan may not have any significance here, but he’s still Seijuro Akashi. What makes him who he is is his refusal to follow anybody’s orders but his father’s own. Emerald will tell him he was too prideful then, but that part will never change.
His thoughts go back to a previous conversation. Emerald once mentioned grabbing power, taking what’s someone else’s. While that’s still not what he wants to do, he does have to take matters into his own hands now. He’ll... have to gain power in another way.
When he looks back at Emerald, there’s a bit of darkness in his gaze. Akashi presents himself as nice and someone everybody should like, but there’s always been some darkness lingering in him. He’s not prince charming, and his life isn’t a basket of flowers. Emerald may think that Akashi is spoiled and always gets what he wants, or however it is she thinks of him, but what she’s seen has always been one half of him. Bits of his other half surfaces, hints of it manifesting when the hue of his left eye turns gold, iris catlike and slitted. When he blinks, his eye is back to being red. ]
If it ever happens again, I’d prefer if it didn’t happen in front of me.
[ Emerald doesn't necessarily blame him, but she won't deny that what she'd planned couldn't happen because of his arrogance. He had too much pride, and in this case it would've gotten them both killed if she hadn't acted how she did. It's not his fault, he couldn't have known, but she isn't going to pretend that she didn't try when he asked her intent.
She knows better than to say that to someone, which is why she doesn't say anything about fault or blame. It's why she didn't tell Mayuzumi or Kuroko the details of what happened. That's Akashi's cross to bear, and his fault to overcome if he wants to protect the people around him.
There's a glint in his eye for a moment and she isn't sure what to make of it- she hasn't seen anything like that before with him, and it's gone so quickly if Emerald wasn't well acquainted with illusions, she might've thought it was one.
She opens her mouth to say something, hesitates, then tries again. ]
Seijuro, I don't want to kill. I will, and I'll let myself have fun with it because it'll destroy me if I can't. It does when I can't smile through it. I've done things I was the only one who couldn't. [ The things she has nightmares about. ] I'm not going to kill anyone unless I have to here.
[ She leans back in her chair, holding her own arms and staring up at the ceiling for a moment. ]
The only reason I even have besides self-defense here is for you, but I'll keep to if the choice is kill or be killed for both of us.
[ It’s a relief to hear that she doesn’t like doing it, but it’s also very concerning that she lets herself have fun with it. No, not just concerning. It’s alarming. He hadn’t pegged Emerald to be some sort of sadistic person, and maybe he doesn’t want to see her that way. Emerald is, by no means, perfect, but he would prefer to see her in the way he’s always seen her than acknowledge and support what she actually does back in Remnant.
He thinks his message has been received, though. Perhaps he could say more, about the last time they talked about this, when Emerald admitted the things she’s done before. Akashi’s chosen to not speak of it; it’s not something to celebrate. He acknowledges it and has learned to accept it. That’s just about all he can do right now. ]
I wish I could tell you that you shouldn’t do it, but I’m not your boss.
[ He’s... He’s just whatever he is to Emerald. She said he’s a friend, but he was also hurt at the time when she called him one.
As for Akashi, though, he wishes he could cleanse her of her wrongdoings. ]
[ She pauses for a moment, shifting uncomfortably in her chair as she tries to make a decision about something. She ends up deciding against it. In the end, even if she wants to protect Akashi- and part of that means protecting him from herself and her own loyalties, she can't betray Cinder. Showing Akashi the faces of Salem's faction, even just to tell him to avoid them, would be wrong. ]
You said questions. That wasn't the only one, right?
[ He hadn’t expect Emerald to call him important, but it’s nice to know. It makes a part of him want to know why he’s considered such, for his own ego, but asking would be a little too much. ]
I went straight to the point. There was more, but I don’t think it’s necessary to ask anymore.
[ Fine. She has something she wants to say then, and she doesn't really hesitate this time if he's done asking. She's changing what she said before, if only because she's not really sure that he liked the idea of her protecting him. If he's scared of her, it's because she feels like she's out of his control, right? So rather than that... ]
I'll promise not to kill anyone without your permission, but you still need to make a place for yourself. You don't have combative talents, but you have people who need a place too who do. You started something already, you weren't going the wrong direction even if you were going a little recklessly.
[ Is there any other way to tell him not to give up without implying that he's giving up or running away? She thinks that's the best she can do it. ]
Akashi doesn’t seem interested at what Emerald says at first. His initial idea is to dismiss it, but the good part in him decides not to. Emerald likely cares for him and this is her way of showing it. ]
That’s not my place. [ Going with others and travelling to other places. It’s not his niche, it looks like. ] I’m better off doing something else, and I still intend to find out what it is.
[ He needs a purpose to properly function. He’s been doing a lot of things for himself lately, and now he has to elevate himself and make himself grow. Eventually, he’ll find a book about learning magic and improving dunamis. He’ll learn about life and death and controlling elements and his surroundings.
For now, he’s still looking for where it is he should be going by trying out the various paths available. ]
[ Look, Emerald's never had to be supportive before and she's pretty sure Akashi has a hard enough time with her teasing him for her to actually lay down anything she'd think of as harsh truths. ]
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I'm not saying I'm miserable. [ He finally sits down and places the plate at the centre of the table. ] I'm just trying to justify why I'm like this.
How have you been doing?
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I'm teasing you. [ He'll never learn this teasing thing, she's sure. ]
Same as ever, you?
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Ah.
[ It's not funny, but he doesn't say that out loud. ]
I'm a lot better now. Thanks to you.
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Thanks to the doctors. All I did was lug you around like a tall potato sack.
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[ Maybe Emerald doesn't want the credit, but she still did something, and Akashi's not going to disregard that. ]
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[ She says it as she sits down with the tea, watching Akashi as he finishes setting out the snacks. Once they're plated she'll take one off and hold it in front of her, looking pretty excited about it. They were pretty good, and it's probably too casually that she says this: ]
If anyone threatens you, just call me and I'll take care of it.
[ She lets it end at that. She'll try not to kill anyone in front of him, but she's not going to promise no one will get hurt. She tried to make sure no one got hurt, but Akashi was too arrogant to cooperate. Trying anything as benevolent as a peaceful solution despite that she's capable of it is too much of a risk with someone who won't listen to her. She won't risk their lives to try to prevent bloodshed. But since he's so sensitive about it, because it's so fresh to him, she adds as if it should be a comfort to know: ]
Non-lethally if avoidable.
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[ The usual cordial smile he has plastered on his face disappears, replaced by something more serious. He doesn’t want to think about what happened, but he can’t exactly stop thinking about it. Emerald is right in thinking that it’s a fresh memory. It’s only been recently he’s gotten over being bit by a vampire (though he’s still angry about the situation), and then getting poisoned happened... ]
I’ll just be staying in the city from now on. At least here, I’ll be safe.
[ And if anybody threatens him here, it will be a lot more manageable. ]
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[ There's a distinctive tone to her voice, and though it's not quite snide, it's clear that she doesn't buy what he's saying one bit. Not the part that he'll be staying in the city- she's already forming her own opinions on how Akashi's a lot of bark and very little bite. But her own experiences, knowing Mercury's experiences, very much colors her view of what he thinks is safe. Rather than overcome his weakness, he's choosing to hide and hope that his survival isn't threatened again. He's not safe, he's just decided to lie to himself and bank on everyone around him being strong enough to handle what he can't. ]
So did you bring these because you liked them or I liked them?
[ She's certainly not going to be the one to rain down on his parade unless he pushes it. She pops the mochi into her mouth, instead focusing on her question. She's definitely not complaining about the mochi. ]
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Do you... not like them?
[ She’s eating, though. Forgive the confused look on Akashi’s face, because he’s not sure what Emerald is trying to say by asking such a question. ]
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.......
Ok! Swallowed! ]
I like them, I was just wondering. I was just telling Tetsuya the other day that you let me try these, don't blame me that it's suspicious timing.
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[ Finally, he takes a piece of mochi for himself to eat. This is all the sweets he’ll be eating for the month. :)
There’s something else he wants to say, though. Something about what happened, but he figures to just bring it up later on. Maybe once they’re done eating. ]
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[ She finds it kind of funny that they cook and buy groceries and play wine pong. ]
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[ That’s just something to do while talking! ]
It would be wrong to pretend what happened in Shaarnath didn’t... well, happen. [ He looks at his tea. The usual arrogance he has in each stare replaced by a pensive look. ] I wanted to thank you, but I also want to ask some questions.
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Good choice on bringing sweets to get me in a good mood then.
[ She won't promise to answer everything but she'll at least hear what he wants to know. ]
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[ That wasn't why he brought food, Emerald. But anyway, Akashi will get straight to business. He had wanted to wait until they had finished eating, but... it seems like the time is right, now. ]
I'd been wondering. . . did you really intend to kill that man?
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She doesn't have to lie about this, at least. Her intent wasn't to kill them. ]
If you'd cooperated, I was going to make them mis-see binding our wrists, then mis-see us walking ahead of them. We would get them out into the hallway and secured an exit, then just fell back while they kept walking. They wouldn't have realized we were gone until we had plenty of time to get out of sight. No one would've gotten hurt but me, and only a headache. Those two were just desperate to survive without being imprisoned for the rest of their lives, I would've let them get away if they hadn't hurt you. Intent doesn't always matter.
[ And the second they had, it was a matter of survival. She wouldn't have hesitated if Akashi hadn't stopped her, she was eliminating a threat. ]
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He decides to just let it pass. He’s not going to apologise for not wanting to kneel for anybody. The power he holds in Japan may not have any significance here, but he’s still Seijuro Akashi. What makes him who he is is his refusal to follow anybody’s orders but his
father’sown. Emerald will tell him he was too prideful then, but that part will never change.His thoughts go back to a previous conversation. Emerald once mentioned grabbing power, taking what’s someone else’s. While that’s still not what he wants to do, he does have to take matters into his own hands now. He’ll... have to gain power in another way.
When he looks back at Emerald, there’s a bit of darkness in his gaze. Akashi presents himself as nice and someone everybody should like, but there’s always been some darkness lingering in him. He’s not prince charming, and his life isn’t a basket of flowers. Emerald may think that Akashi is spoiled and always gets what he wants, or however it is she thinks of him, but what she’s seen has always been one half of him. Bits of his other half surfaces, hints of it manifesting when the hue of his left eye turns gold, iris catlike and slitted. When he blinks, his eye is back to being red. ]
If it ever happens again, I’d prefer if it didn’t happen in front of me.
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She knows better than to say that to someone, which is why she doesn't say anything about fault or blame. It's why she didn't tell Mayuzumi or Kuroko the details of what happened. That's Akashi's cross to bear, and his fault to overcome if he wants to protect the people around him.
There's a glint in his eye for a moment and she isn't sure what to make of it- she hasn't seen anything like that before with him, and it's gone so quickly if Emerald wasn't well acquainted with illusions, she might've thought it was one.
She opens her mouth to say something, hesitates, then tries again. ]
Seijuro, I don't want to kill. I will, and I'll let myself have fun with it because it'll destroy me if I can't. It does when I can't smile through it. I've done things I was the only one who couldn't. [ The things she has nightmares about. ] I'm not going to kill anyone unless I have to here.
[ She leans back in her chair, holding her own arms and staring up at the ceiling for a moment. ]
The only reason I even have besides self-defense here is for you, but I'll keep to if the choice is kill or be killed for both of us.
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He thinks his message has been received, though. Perhaps he could say more, about the last time they talked about this, when Emerald admitted the things she’s done before. Akashi’s chosen to not speak of it; it’s not something to celebrate. He acknowledges it and has learned to accept it. That’s just about all he can do right now. ]
I wish I could tell you that you shouldn’t do it, but I’m not your boss.
[ He’s... He’s just whatever he is to Emerald. She said he’s a friend, but he was also hurt at the time when she called him one.
As for Akashi, though, he wishes he could cleanse her of her wrongdoings. ]
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[ She pauses for a moment, shifting uncomfortably in her chair as she tries to make a decision about something. She ends up deciding against it. In the end, even if she wants to protect Akashi- and part of that means protecting him from herself and her own loyalties, she can't betray Cinder. Showing Akashi the faces of Salem's faction, even just to tell him to avoid them, would be wrong. ]
You said questions. That wasn't the only one, right?
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I went straight to the point. There was more, but I don’t think it’s necessary to ask anymore.
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I'll promise not to kill anyone without your permission, but you still need to make a place for yourself. You don't have combative talents, but you have people who need a place too who do. You started something already, you weren't going the wrong direction even if you were going a little recklessly.
[ Is there any other way to tell him not to give up without implying that he's giving up or running away? She thinks that's the best she can do it. ]
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Akashi doesn’t seem interested at what Emerald says at first. His initial idea is to dismiss it, but the good part in him decides not to. Emerald likely cares for him and this is her way of showing it. ]
That’s not my place. [ Going with others and travelling to other places. It’s not his niche, it looks like. ] I’m better off doing something else, and I still intend to find out what it is.
[ He needs a purpose to properly function. He’s been doing a lot of things for himself lately, and now he has to elevate himself and make himself grow. Eventually, he’ll find a book about learning magic and improving dunamis. He’ll learn about life and death and controlling elements and his surroundings.
For now, he’s still looking for where it is he should be going by trying out the various paths available. ]
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What's next then?
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[ He really doesn’t know. :’) ]
For now, I’ll focus on preparing for my birthday and the housewarming party.
[ Oh, and yes— ]
You’re invited, by the way.
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